Why We Write Family Stories

Successful author, Isabel Allende, tells us to write what should not be forgotten. Most things worth remembering are stored in the attic of our mind, and it's up to us to pull them out and put into words for others to read, or merely for ourselves.

Those few words of advice are powerful. We don't want to forget our extended family, our growing-up years, our ancestors, our friends, what life was like in our lifetime, and more. All those things made us the people we are today. In science class, we learned that each of us is the result of both genetics and environment. Family carries both.

I recently heard from a second cousin whom I had not seen since we were both small children. Our fathers were first cousins, and our paternal grandfathers were brothers. What a delight it has been to visit with him via email and to learn more about our common family history. There have been ancestory charts shared and a few family stories. No doubt there will be more of those to come.

Because my cousin needed some dates for the six-page family tree he has constructed, I ended up getting in touch with two of my first cousins and a niece. Family history and family stories are bringing our family closer than ever before. 

I have a chart that traces my paternal ancestors back to the 17th century in France and then Canada prior to emigration to the United States. That's wonderful, but what I treasure more are the family stories that both my parents, aunts, and uncles told through the years. I didn't have the joy of knowing two of my grandparents at all, and the other two died when I was quite young. I learned a great deal about all four from the family stories told around the dinner table. 

No one but me ever wrote those stories. Telling a story to family members is wonderful. It's a living testimony to what families are all about. That's only part of what needs to be done. Someone in the family must write the stories for posterity. If three people do so, all the better, but choose at least one person to take on the responsibility. It IS a responsibility for the immediate and future generations. 

Family stories touch on family history in bits and pieces. One important reason is that we should learn the medical history in our families as it may be important to our own health today. Another is to understand certain habits that seem to be passed on in families. It's also of interest to see what personality traits are repeated in generations from past to present. 

One great reason to write family stories is that they are entertaining. It's fun to learn what our grandparents and parents were like as kids or young adults. 

There are families who love to tell the family stories while in others, you have to literally pull the information from them. If you have younger family members who want to know about the past, share it eagerly. If you can't write the story, ask one of the younger ones to do it for you. The main thing is to have the stories written so they don't get lost. 

Some of those stories will be humorous, some sad, some shocking perhaps, and some dealing with trauma. None of it should be forgotten. All the stories of all your family members are a part of you.