Wednesday, June 13, 2018

Bits and Pieces On Description in Writing


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Stephen King's quote started me thinking about the use of description in our writing. When we use words to describe a scene, a person or place, we do it to create a mental image for the reader. When I read a novel, I like to have bits and pieces of description sprinkled through the story. I gather these bits and develop a complete picture of the character. Sometimes, it helps me like a character but it can also create the opposite reaction.

Description not only helps us see something or someone but aids us in feeling, too. If I read that a character is trembling on a hot June day, I know it is probably from fright. Say that she skips down a path swinging her school bag and I am pretty sure she is not worried about going to school that day. 

As the writer, you can tell me how that character feels but, if you show me through descriptive writing, the image will stay with me and mean more to me. 

What to use to describe: 

Adjectives tend to be the parts of speech we use to describe people, places or things--you know the group--nouns. It's fine to use adjectives as long as you don't overdo it. Beginning writers tend to think that, if one adjective is good, three must be stupendous. Use too many and you lose something. One, or even two, words to describe a noun is more than enough. It actually makes a stronger, clearer statement. Use three, or Heaven forbid, four and you're in overkill. 

Similes compare one thing to another but use as or like in the phrase. 
  • A kite is like an eagle soaring high above the earth. 
  • This storm is like a nightmare.
  • Tony's speech was as boring as watching it rain.
Similes are helpful in describing but you can overuse them just as easily as you can the adjectives. I once knew a writer who was able to craft a good story but she loved similes and she peppered her manuscript with them page after page. I finally got to the point of screaming, internally, No more!

Adverbs describe verbs. We all know that. So, they must be words we can use to help the writer see what a character does or what happens.  The problem with using adverbs to describe is that they often tend to be telling rather than showing. 
  • Mary ate hesitantly. 
  • John ran the last mile of the race, shakily.
  • Mr. Brown gulped his beer hastily.
How can you change each of the sentences above to show instead of telling?

Description allows writers to offer beautiful prose to their readers. As Stephen King tells us--the scene or person is a part of the imagination of the writer but he/she must be able to transport it to the mind of the reader. 

My one personal rule regarding description is that 'less is more.' I do not like novels that spend paragraph upon paragraph describing one tiny part of the scenery. Unless it is of great importance to what happens later, keep it short and sweet. Nor do I want to read five paragraphs that tell me exactly how Susie Q went to the fridge, what she took out, where she put it, how she made the sandwich. I don't care about that if it doesn't move the story forward. Just tell me that Susie Q made a sandwich and sat down to read John's letter with the startling news in it once again.  Which of those two things are more important? 

Here's another scenario:  The text says John's alarm rang. He turned it off before opening his eyes. He swung his feet to the side of the bed. He stood up and walked over to the window. We don't need to know that he swung his feet to the side of the bed nor that he stood up before he walked to the window. That's a given, isn't if? If he's in the bed and walks to the window, our mind tells us how he did it. The writer does not need to go into detail. 

This is a mixed bag today on description but maybe something here will resonate with you as you work on your next writing project.  





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