Writers--Step Off the Worry Wagon

 

A lot of writers are also worriers. Hmm, is 'worriers' an actual word? Yes, it is. A worrier is someone who spends a great deal of time thinking about problems, what has already occurred, and what might happen later. Worry causes anxiety and apprehension. It gives us all kinds of physical symptoms and emotional upheaval. It should be avoided!

It should be avoided. Sounds so easy, doesn't it? Our poster today tells us that worry is a waste of time, doesn't change a thing, and steals your joy. It also keeps you busy doing nothing. Good points. It's easy to read those words, but putting them into practice is another thing altogether. 

When you make a submission to a publication, do you spend the days waiting for word from the editor concerned about your chances? Do you race to the computer every morning to see if you have an email from the editor? Do you fret that maybe you should have made one more editing before you sent it in? Stop that kind of worry. Your story or essay or poem has been sent. The other end is completely out of your hands. Worrying is useless. All it does is upset you. The fact is that you are either going to get a rejection or an acceptance. Nothing you do now will change that.

Writers worry that they don't have what it takes to get published. Worrying isn't going to make one twit of difference. What it takes to become a published writer is a great deal of effort on your part. And time. And learning as you go. 

Are you in a writing group and worry that you don't measure up to the status of the other writers? Stop worrying and start learning from them. Make an assessment of those who are successful. Figure out what it is that makes them a published writer, then work towards the same for yourself. If the group critiques each other's submissions, read all the critiques, not just the ones for your own writing. Reading those critiques is worth a great deal. It's a perfect gift to you to be able to learn from other writers. I'm a seasoned writer, but I still read the critiques of the writers in my online group, and I still find something worth noting and continue to learn. Quit worrying and start learning.

It's easy for me to tell you to stop worrying, but not a sure thing for you to throw off the mantle of concern like flicking a fly from your arm. You're going to have to do a lot of self-chastisement. When you start the worry process, take a step back and think about the situation. Ask yourself if your worry is worthwhile. Will it change the situation? In most cases, it probably won't make a difference. 

Step off the worry wagon and spend your time in becoming a better and stronger writer. 

Writers Who Worry

We send in a submission for publication or to a contest, and then comes the long wait. Some publications give an indication of how long it will be until you hear something from them--either yay or nay. Some give no timetable whatsoever. Some never respond unless they want to publish your work. Worrisome!

Contests most often state when the winners will be announced. That is less of a concern than submitting for publication. Sometimes, it's still a long time from entry to finding out if you placed or not. My state authors club contest has a submission deadline of June 15th. Winners are announced in early October at the state convention. Meanwhile, those who enter cannot submit the same piece for publication. The rule is that whatever was entered cannot be published prior to the winners being revealed. Technically, you can submit to an editor, but if they want to publish, can you say, "That's great, but you can't publish until after October." That's rather hard to do. At that point, you'd need to decide whether to withdraw your contest entry and accept the publication offer or nix it and leave the contest entry. I find it's better to not enter a contest and send the same piece out for publication possibilities. It's not going to happen often, but if it does, you have a problem to work out.

All of the above is leading up to today's topic. Writers who worry. It's the human part of us that causes us to worry about our writing ability, the long waits we endure to hear from an editor or contest manager, and the reviews or the readers we attract. We question ourself on various parts of our writing life. We fret, voice concern, and just plain worry. I doubt there is any writer who has not spent some time worrying about various facets of the writing journey. 

The bigger question is why do you worry and how much do you worry? Today's poster above gives the best advice for this problem. The biggest thing is that worrying changes absolutely nothing. It also hurts no one but yourself. Your sleep can suffer. You can lose the joy in other parts of your life by letting worry take over. You usually have little or no control over the thing you're worried about.

Is there a solution? You hold the key. No one else can do this for you. One thing you must learn to do is have faith in yourself as a writer. You must come to a point where you believe in your writing ability. Be willing to admit that not everything you submit is going to get published (or win a contest). There's nothing wrong with giving yourself a mental pep talk. Accentuate the positives in your writing life. 

If you're a beginning writer, finding those positives might be a little harder. Even so, try to consider the positives rather than the negatives. The latter will only add to your worry. What do you like about your writing? Dwell on that rather than the parts you hate. And know this--all writers hate some things about their writing, but they also have areas that are very satisfying. 

I've learned to take the attitude that, if something is meant to happen, it will. If I get a rejection, there is usually a good reason for it. The fault could easily lie in me, not that dumb editor who didn't want to publish the piece I sent in good faith. Most of the time, I don't worry. Remember that popular song of many decades ago titled Que sera, sera? The loose translation is Whatever will be, will be. No amount of worry in the world can change what happens.

Instead of wasting time worrying, work at being the best writer you can be. The more success you have, the less there will be to worry about.

Writers Who Fret, Worry and Stew

Fret, Worry, Stew...

It seems to be a part of the human psyche to fret, worry, or stew over things beyond our control. I found several good quotes about worrying that I'll share here today and then my own thoughts on writers who worry.

The Quotes:

1. “Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere”
   – Erma Bombeck
2. “A day of worry is more exhausting than a day of work.”
   – John Lubbock
3. “Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith.”
   – Henry Ward Beecher
4. “Worry is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.”
   – Arthur Somers Roche
5. “Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.”
   – Swedish Proverb

Writers and Worry:

What do writers worry about? Plenty! 

1. They fret over the beginning of a story.
2. They stew over the ending of a story.
3. They worry over where to send a submission.
4. They worry that they'll never be published. (or published again)
5. They fret over reviews that are not glowing.
6. They worry about the critiques others give their work.
7. They stew over not hearing from an editor.
8. They worry that their writing is not as good as it should be.

There are other concerns that writers have but the list above covers some of the main ones. 

Worrying is a lesson in futility. It doesn't change a thing. Erma Bombeck's quote above illustrates that thought. We need to have the attitude that whatever is going to happen is what we'll deal with if need be. 

If you worry over the beginning or ending of a story, pick the one that makes you feel the best. That's probably going to be the right one. If you are fretting over an opening line, try another one or two or three until you find one you're comfortable with. Don't just sit there and worry about what you wrote.

If you worry that you'll never be published again, that may be what happens. Instead, you need to keep writing and keep submitting. It's the only way to be published.

If you get poor critiques or less than pleasing reviews, you have an opportunity to do correct your errors or to do better the next time. Worrying about it will only give you a headache.

If you stew over weeks going by without a response from an editor, push it aside and start a new writing project. You may hear from the editor later or might never get a response. Many only respond when accepting. 

If you worry about your writing not being as good as you hoped, then get to work learning more about the craft through reading reference books on writing. Take a class or two. Attend a conference with workshop speakers. And keep writing. The more you write, the better writer you will be. 

Pick a day. Maybe tomorrow. Make a vow to not spend one minute worrying about anything writing-related. Practice having a little faith in yourself.

Are Writers Worry Birds?

Submit a finished piece that felt satisfying to you and then what? Sit back and wait? Start counting days until you get a response from the editor? Bite your nails and worry? 

It seems to be a natural thing for humans to fret and worry. What good does it do us? All the worry in the world is not going to change the amount of time that it takes for an editor to notify his/her decision. It's not going to make the number of days we wait any less. It's not going to change the little things we wished we'd added or left out before we sent the submission.

The one and only thing worry does is make us miserable. Self-inflicted punishment! 

Even knowing that, it's difficult to control worry. Having a poster like the one above where you see it frequently might help. Read it over and over and the message could make the words and what they really say sink in. Use a mantra like I refuse to worry. Use it often. We know that we learn through repetition so repeat! And repeat!

Some of us are natural worriers. About everything! It's most likely harder for those people to rein in the worry bird than for ones who worry now and then. I'm guessing that people with negative attitudes worry more than those who look for the positives in life. 

One help for writers is to have faith in your writing, to have self-confidence in yourself as a writer. Dwell on the positive things in your writing world and work on correcting the rest a little at a time. 

Chase the big. black cloud that seems to follow you away. There's sunshine behind it. Turn toward those rays to help your writing journey and ease your worries. A little at a time. Nothing changes overnight. Use some of that persistence and patience that I employ as keywords to our writing. It's just as important in the worrisome times. 

A Big Waste of Time

Writers tend to be worriers. True or false? I think that a majority of writers are worriers. So, what do they worry about?  

Writers worry about: 

• never getting published
• the length of time it takes to hear from an editor
• the quality of writing they produce
• whether or not their writing shows improvement as time moves on
• whether they can write a full novel
• being a so-so poet
• meeting deadlines
• finding time to write
• continuing to find story ideas
• word count
• whether to submit to no-pay places
• self-publishing
• marketing their writing
• book signings
• having the means to go to writing conference
• putting too many cliches into a story
• getting just the right amount of sensory details
• the grammar and spelling parts of writing
• having a suitable vocabulary
• and more and more and more!

Yes, there are lots of things we writers could worry about, but as today's poster tells us, it is one of our biggest wastes of time. Nothing changes because we worry. All it does is give us a headache or a tummy ache, makes us think bizarre things and labels us as Grumpy Gertie or Growly George. 

When you meet one of the things in the list above, stop and ask yourself Is this really worth worrying about? Most of the time, the answer should be a resounding No! Then ask Will my worry change the problem? 

Next, consider the alternative to the worrying part. What can you do to keep from worrying or to change whatever it is. Usually, we can tell ourselves to do our best and move on. We'll fare much better and be a happier, more positive person. 

If you're in the 'Worries a Lot' group, you aren't going to change overnight. Like most things, we need to work at it a little at a time. Inches turn into feet, feet into yards, yards into miles. Eventually, you'll reach your destination.