Note: I was asked to be a Guest Blogger at Intralingo, a blog written by Lisa Carter who translates books from Spanish to English and also writes. Lisa asked me to submit anything about writing. I sent her an article that deals with the frustrations and satisfactions of writing. The post is up today. You can read "Two Sides of the Coin" on Lisa's blog.
Now, on to today's post for my own blog. I was critiquing a submission sent in by a member of my online crit group recently when I noticed that I was marking several spots with the same comment. The writer had repeated the same word in two or three consecutive sentences in several paragraphs. We do that unconsciously and often catch it when we go back and edit our work. But sometimes, we slide right over it, concentrating on what appears to be the more important things.
When a reader finds these repetitions, boredom begins to set in. The flow is no longer running smoothly and the writing begins to appear a bit juvenile. Once it's pointed out, we see it so clearly and realize that it becomes a distraction. The last thing we want to do is bore or distract our readers.
Take a look at these two paragraphs. Which one do you like best?
A. We made our way to the river's edge and scanned the quiet water. Next, we made our way to the swinging bridge and stepped cautiously onto it. We made our way across step by step, holding our breath and refusing to look down as the rope bridge swayed.
B. We made our way to the river's edge and scanned the quiet water. I followed John to the swinging bridge, and stepped cautiously onto it. We inched across, step by step, holding our breath and refusing to look down as the rope bridge swayed.
It's so easy to write an essay with excellent information but fill it with far too many she, he, we, or I.Read any one of those words over and over and it starts to turn a reader into a quitter.
When you edit your work, look for repetitious words. Use a different word for some of them. You may have to change the order of your sentence to do so, but whatever works. Go for it.
Now, on to today's post for my own blog. I was critiquing a submission sent in by a member of my online crit group recently when I noticed that I was marking several spots with the same comment. The writer had repeated the same word in two or three consecutive sentences in several paragraphs. We do that unconsciously and often catch it when we go back and edit our work. But sometimes, we slide right over it, concentrating on what appears to be the more important things.
When a reader finds these repetitions, boredom begins to set in. The flow is no longer running smoothly and the writing begins to appear a bit juvenile. Once it's pointed out, we see it so clearly and realize that it becomes a distraction. The last thing we want to do is bore or distract our readers.
Take a look at these two paragraphs. Which one do you like best?
A. We made our way to the river's edge and scanned the quiet water. Next, we made our way to the swinging bridge and stepped cautiously onto it. We made our way across step by step, holding our breath and refusing to look down as the rope bridge swayed.
B. We made our way to the river's edge and scanned the quiet water. I followed John to the swinging bridge, and stepped cautiously onto it. We inched across, step by step, holding our breath and refusing to look down as the rope bridge swayed.
It's so easy to write an essay with excellent information but fill it with far too many she, he, we, or I.Read any one of those words over and over and it starts to turn a reader into a quitter.
When you edit your work, look for repetitious words. Use a different word for some of them. You may have to change the order of your sentence to do so, but whatever works. Go for it.
Enjoyed "Two Sides of the Coin". It seems like sometimes I read a story and like it, other times I will read the same story and want to toss it out. I don't because I know the next time I read it I will probably find something worth saving. Editing is tough.
ReplyDeleteI think those repetitious words or phrases are easier to find when I read aloud.
You've made a very good point about reading aloud to find repeated words or phrases. They really jump out at you then. Wish I'd thought to put that point in my posting. Thanks for pointing this out.
ReplyDelete