The Whistle of a Train--A Sensory Detail

Let's look at the things we hear, one of the sensory details we put in our fiction, personal essays, family stories, and even poetry. 

This morning, I was catching up on email when I heard the whine of a train whistle, blown several times. I wondered if it was the historic Union Pacific train, known as Big Boy, making its way across Kansas this week in celebration of 150 years of the Transcontinental Railroad. It was due to stop here in our town at 9:30 a.m. 

The sound of that whistle made me stop and listen. I always liked to hear the train whistles when I was a child. We lived across the street from the railroad tracks, so we were treated to that arresting sound on a frequent basis. I can remember being in bed on a summer night, windows open, hoping for the train to come by and announce its presence. When I did hear it, I wondered where it was going. My own world in those days was quite small, but I knew a train went to many places.

What do you think of when you hear a train's whistle? Does it trigger any memories for you? Do you think of it as mournful or cheerful? Is it different at nighttime when the train moves through the darkness than it is on a sunny day? 

The train whistle is only one of many sounds we put into our writing. You don't want to say The train blew its whistle. Your reader knows what a train whistle sounds like, but why not enlarge on it to make it more interesting? The train's whistle whined loudly as it passed by the crossing gates, growing dimmer and dimmer as it sped down the track. 

Try writing a sentence or two for each of the sounds below giving your reader a clear picture of the sound. Avoid cliches. Delve into your memory bank.

• jet plane
• waves on the shore
• ball hitting a baseball bat
• washing machine
• school bell
• air brakes on a bus
• popcorn popping
• crying child
• church bells
• piano
• cow mooing
• birdsong

Adding sensory details, like hearing, can bring your writing to life. Don't be a generic writer who only lists the main points and neglects the small details that make writing a pleasure for the reader.