Repeating Words

What we strive for in our writing

Today is our first day of addressing the mechanics of writing--the how you say it part of writing a story, article or essay. 

In my online writing group, one of the things critiquers mark over and over again is repetition of words. Using the same words two, even three times in one sentence or within perhaps two sentences or paragraph is a very common error. It's one we should catch when we edit our own work but, as we read what we've written, our eyes glide right over those repeated words. 

Yes, there are times when we use words close together to make a point. Note the first sentence of the paragraph above. I said ....over and over again. It's used for emphasis. Now, take a look at the sentences below and you'll see words that should be changed. 

A.  Bill left his shoes under the bed, climbed into the bed and fell asleep immediately.

      Better:  Bill left his shoes under the bed, climbed in and fell asleep immediately. 

B.  I've left the bread on the table for you next to the peanut butter on the table. 

     Better:  I've left the bread on the table for you next to the peanut butter. 

C.  Susan exited the stage she had danced on only hours after she found her ballet shoes and she knew she could be in the recital.

     Better:  Susan exited the stage danced on only hours after her ballet shoes were found and the recital went on.

D.  Timothy noted the long stretch of stairs ahead, climbed the stairs, then looked down the stairs to see if anyone had followed.

       Better:  Timothy noted the long stretch of stairs ahead, climbed them and looked down to see if anyone had followed.

If you've already told the reader about the 'bed' as in Example A, there is no need to repeat 'bed.' Sentences written with repetition of words can end up being boring.

Is it possible we repeat words to make sure the reader knows exactly what happened? Is it possible we don't give our audience enough credit for figuring things out on their own?  

Do we sometimes repeat words because we find it easier than thinking up a new way to say the same thing without using them again and again? (yep, I did it again but for emphasis!)

I think we often make this error subconsciously. What we must do is be conscious of looking for the problem as we revise and edit our writing. 

Just for fun, pull out a story or essay from your files and look through it to see if you have been guilty of repeating words. The vast majority of us are going to find some, myself included.