I've been working on a personal essay off and on for weeks. First drafts are never terrific but this one I don't like one bit. It's a topic that came to me one day that I wanted to pursue. It felt worthwhile and I was inspired to give it a go.
I opened a new page in Word and started typing what came to mind. My fingers flew over the keys and I was encouraged. When I finished, I read it over. Disappointment surrounded me, disgust popped up, as well. The piece just didn't gel. It didn't convey what had been in my mind. It gave no reason for being. Who would want to read this? That was my thought. So, I put it in a file to mellow for a few days. I actually let it sit for a couple of weeks as I wasn't eager to get back to it.
I reworked parts of the essay, tried to bring out a lesson learned, read it over and felt the same emotions as I did with the original writing. What is wrong with this? A question with no answer. So, I turned to my online writing group for help. I subbed it with a note saying that I was not happy with the piece, knew something was amiss and needed some honest opinions and suggestions. That's where the story sits right now as I wait for the sage advice of experienced writers.
All writers run into a situation like this now and then. What do you do when it happens? You could delete the whole thing and regard it as a stupid idea in the first place. I wouldn't advise that solution. Sure, it would be gone and something you didn't have to worry about. but think about this. If the idea appealed to you before you started the writing for the first draft, there must have been a reason. You were inspired in some way and you wanted to write about the subject that had come to you. It's worth saving.
You can do what I have done. Let another writer, or several, look at your draft. Others see your writing from a different perspective. One of them might pinpoint the problem in a split second. When we write, we're very subjective. We also know in our head what we want to convey but the words that pop onto the screen don't jive with our thoughts. Or they don't make our thoughts clear to a reader. Maybe the words in our heart are filled with emotion but the emotion doesn't come through in the writing. Another writer will see that and let you know what changes might help. Heed the advice.
When you submit it to a group as I did, you should get feedback from more than one person. Note carefully what things are pointed out multiple times. If several see the same trouble spot, you'll know that's a place that needs work. Some writers pay big bucks for a professional critique. Join a group and help one another for free. Or ask a personal writer friend or two to look at your draft.
Another way to make your draft better is to let it sit for a week or two after you write the first draft. When you go back and read it again, you'll see problems you hadn't noticed earlier. You'll also note the parts that are good and know that you want to keep them in the next draft. Occasionally, you'll run into a brick wall even after letting the draft age a bit, just as I did. That's when you want to seek outside help.
Every piece of writing is not going to being a gold star edition when you first start working on it. Once in awhile, it happens but more often, that first draft ends up being one of many before you're ready to submit for publication.
When you read the first draft, try to step back and read objectively. It's not an easy thing to do because we are immersed in our own ideas, our own way of conveying a message to our readers.
Know this, too--when you write something that doesn't seem to work out the way you'd hoped, you are not alone. Many, many writers experience the same thing. Even our friend, Snoopy, feels just like you and I when he writes a poor first draft.
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